Saturday, April 12, 2008
hey yo,
heres what i wanted to say
the past few days were kinda bad.
well.
cause of the cookie sales, i had to plan out everything,
run about to get permission from people to do things and write proposal on shit.
and many things werent working out
then there were tests too.
chem engligh maths physics napfa hsk.
so juggling studying till 2 am and organizing the sales,
i was stressed.
to the max.
then there's also buzz@canteen.
im sorry, im not helping out much.
):
i dont get it either, why its always US doing the work
why not the others?
yeah. we're more or less the in charge, but we're also students.
humans,
uh,
i think im going crazy.
lets see:
the sales thing.
it turned out okay
but the before hand was hard.
i spent 2 weeks, planning out everything.
thank you em and crys who helped out with the planning,
dont know whether i'd stil be alive if you werent there.
and thursday was shit,
i stayed up the whole night,
doing with kelly chloe cherice.
thank emily crys vanessa fongwa and others who helped too.
it meant alot.
but i was so super tired.
we did most things by hand so i had blisters after that.
and some other people didnt do what they were supposed to do properly
and it made me damn freaking stress.
especially when tess called at 1130 and told me the cookies were doing badly.
they had just enough cookies to cover orders.
shit.
but luckily, on friday,
it turned out okay
but cause of lack of sleep.
i felt so freaking bad.
like wanting to faint and everything.
then after that was the coach meeting.
it was cool.
but it didnt sink in till today,
that coach wasnt ever coming back again.
and yesterday,
many things went through my head
i had no sleep on thurs and only 5 hours of sleep on friday.
hsk in the morning.
it was soso.
then there was tuition,
it was so bad.
my teacher kept telling me indirectly,
that it was near impossile for to me get a for o lev express.
like, my foundation is "hen lan"
and all.
at first, i didnt really think much about it.
cause i had other stuff to think about.
then when mum drove me to tennis,
i asked her whether i could have english tuition
then she started telling me about how she was struggling with financial issues,
and how i had to give up TENNIS for tuition.
and for the 100000 time, i explained to her why i needed tennis lessons
and as usual,
we started arguing again.
uhh.
then tennis.
it was just, well.
fucking badddddddddddddddd.
i cant play anymore.
then while waiting for dad to pick me
i wanted to be left alone,
but they didnt alow.
some idiot kept talking to me.
then when i went inside dads car,
i just couldnt take it,
i started crying.
about everything,
chinese, cookies, tennis....blah, on goes the list
i turned my head one side and cried the whole way home.
daddy knew i think
cause at dinner.
he was super nice to me
but mum was mad at me.
she was ignoring me and all.
then this morning,
its like, the reason i woke up was cause mum came into my room and scolded me for sleeping.
i wanted to tell her i really didnt have enough sleep the past two nights( none on thurs and 5houes on fri)
so isnt that gonna be a valid reason for sleeping.
but i didnt get a chance,
she just stomped out of the room.
what a great way to start the day.
then i got started on my work.
calling everyone about their cip hours.
then i told ayushi about the cip part
and she told me another story about the screwed up cookies.
then i was like.
oh shit
i tried calling tessa to ask her, but she didnt pick up
then i got damn stressed.
i had to collate everything by tomorrow, and there was still this BIG HUGE problem about the hours.
so i gave up,
and sat down.
and thought about everything.
i thought about tennis first.
i mean,
no coach, and no proper training,
so how are we gonna get where we want to go?
and coach critisized me on friday,
so i thought over that, and i became quite sad.
then i thought about the cookie sales.
it was okay,
but then i started thinking,
what if, it hadnt been me in charge,
wouldnt it have turned out better?
that isnt a question.
its becoming a statement.
so that got me even sadder.
then i thought about buzz at canteen
i didnt help out much,
so doesnt it make me like her?
then i thought about it all,
and i was super depressed.
i called sarah, thinking that i wanted to talk to her.
but luckily she didnt pick up.
cause i think, if she did, it would have been bad
so i sat down and TRIED to do maths.
i couldnt even do ANYTHING.
so i went to my bed,
sat down, thought more,
and i started crying.
i just cant take it luh.
i feel so damn sick of myself.
i felt so sucky.
then at this time, mummy decides to tell me why she was pissed at me yesterday.
then i felt even worse.
cause everthing seems to be my fault
then sarah called me back
i was like shit,
caue i know i wasnt gonna be able to take talking to her without breaking down.
then she told me how she had guides things, and everything
then when we talked about buzz at canteen,
and how i had cookie sales
i couldnt take it luh.
my voice broke a little,
and i think she noticed a little.
so i got off the phone.
and i started crying again.
like worser.
then i finally decided i wasnt going to angelines house,
cause if i did go,
i wouldnt be able to act all okay.
so here's the reason okay.
im so super sorry, that i cant make it,
hope you forgive me):
and i know what im typing may seem rubbish to you
but i just dont know how to say it better,
just read and dont say anything anymore okay(:
have fun with your planning
heres what i wanted to say
the past few days were kinda bad.
well.
cause of the cookie sales, i had to plan out everything,
run about to get permission from people to do things and write proposal on shit.
and many things werent working out
then there were tests too.
chem engligh maths physics napfa hsk.
so juggling studying till 2 am and organizing the sales,
i was stressed.
to the max.
then there's also buzz@canteen.
im sorry, im not helping out much.
):
i dont get it either, why its always US doing the work
why not the others?
yeah. we're more or less the in charge, but we're also students.
humans,
uh,
i think im going crazy.
lets see:
the sales thing.
it turned out okay
but the before hand was hard.
i spent 2 weeks, planning out everything.
thank you em and crys who helped out with the planning,
dont know whether i'd stil be alive if you werent there.
and thursday was shit,
i stayed up the whole night,
doing with kelly chloe cherice.
thank emily crys vanessa fongwa and others who helped too.
it meant alot.
but i was so super tired.
we did most things by hand so i had blisters after that.
and some other people didnt do what they were supposed to do properly
and it made me damn freaking stress.
especially when tess called at 1130 and told me the cookies were doing badly.
they had just enough cookies to cover orders.
shit.
but luckily, on friday,
it turned out okay
but cause of lack of sleep.
i felt so freaking bad.
like wanting to faint and everything.
then after that was the coach meeting.
it was cool.
but it didnt sink in till today,
that coach wasnt ever coming back again.
and yesterday,
many things went through my head
i had no sleep on thurs and only 5 hours of sleep on friday.
hsk in the morning.
it was soso.
then there was tuition,
it was so bad.
my teacher kept telling me indirectly,
that it was near impossile for to me get a for o lev express.
like, my foundation is "hen lan"
and all.
at first, i didnt really think much about it.
cause i had other stuff to think about.
then when mum drove me to tennis,
i asked her whether i could have english tuition
then she started telling me about how she was struggling with financial issues,
and how i had to give up TENNIS for tuition.
and for the 100000 time, i explained to her why i needed tennis lessons
and as usual,
we started arguing again.
uhh.
then tennis.
it was just, well.
fucking badddddddddddddddd.
i cant play anymore.
then while waiting for dad to pick me
i wanted to be left alone,
but they didnt alow.
some idiot kept talking to me.
then when i went inside dads car,
i just couldnt take it,
i started crying.
about everything,
chinese, cookies, tennis....blah, on goes the list
i turned my head one side and cried the whole way home.
daddy knew i think
cause at dinner.
he was super nice to me
but mum was mad at me.
she was ignoring me and all.
then this morning,
its like, the reason i woke up was cause mum came into my room and scolded me for sleeping.
i wanted to tell her i really didnt have enough sleep the past two nights( none on thurs and 5houes on fri)
so isnt that gonna be a valid reason for sleeping.
but i didnt get a chance,
she just stomped out of the room.
what a great way to start the day.
then i got started on my work.
calling everyone about their cip hours.
then i told ayushi about the cip part
and she told me another story about the screwed up cookies.
then i was like.
oh shit
i tried calling tessa to ask her, but she didnt pick up
then i got damn stressed.
i had to collate everything by tomorrow, and there was still this BIG HUGE problem about the hours.
so i gave up,
and sat down.
and thought about everything.
i thought about tennis first.
i mean,
no coach, and no proper training,
so how are we gonna get where we want to go?
and coach critisized me on friday,
so i thought over that, and i became quite sad.
then i thought about the cookie sales.
it was okay,
but then i started thinking,
what if, it hadnt been me in charge,
wouldnt it have turned out better?
that isnt a question.
its becoming a statement.
so that got me even sadder.
then i thought about buzz at canteen
i didnt help out much,
so doesnt it make me like her?
then i thought about it all,
and i was super depressed.
i called sarah, thinking that i wanted to talk to her.
but luckily she didnt pick up.
cause i think, if she did, it would have been bad
so i sat down and TRIED to do maths.
i couldnt even do ANYTHING.
so i went to my bed,
sat down, thought more,
and i started crying.
i just cant take it luh.
i feel so damn sick of myself.
i felt so sucky.
then at this time, mummy decides to tell me why she was pissed at me yesterday.
then i felt even worse.
cause everthing seems to be my fault
then sarah called me back
i was like shit,
caue i know i wasnt gonna be able to take talking to her without breaking down.
then she told me how she had guides things, and everything
then when we talked about buzz at canteen,
and how i had cookie sales
i couldnt take it luh.
my voice broke a little,
and i think she noticed a little.
so i got off the phone.
and i started crying again.
like worser.
then i finally decided i wasnt going to angelines house,
cause if i did go,
i wouldnt be able to act all okay.
so here's the reason okay.
im so super sorry, that i cant make it,
hope you forgive me):
and i know what im typing may seem rubbish to you
but i just dont know how to say it better,
just read and dont say anything anymore okay(:
have fun with your planning
# posted by Fl. : 10:49 PM
Subscribe to Comments [Atom]